Wednesday, October 29, 2014

How to LOVE: Tips 1 - 10


10.  UNCONDITIONAL LOVE:  You must understand, live and love unconditionally.  This means loving the person for who they are; all the flaws, the mistakes, the good, bad and ugly.  And, often times this means loving the person enough to let him/her go to live out a purpose or a dream.  Unconditional love means loving even when they no longer want to be romantic with you.  Unconditional love doesn't mean that you will love ONLY IF they meet your standards.  No one will ever be perfect, meet all your needs, or treat you as you deserve every day.  No matter what, you have to be willing to stand in your desire to show/give UNCONDITIONAL LOVE.

9. MUST HAVE LOVE FLOW:  True love is in the power to give and receive at your full potential.  If you want to live fully in love, you must be continuously increasing your flow, attracting more love and contributing with love.  Only when you LOVE at your full potential can you receive at your full potential.

8.  REALIZE IT'S NOT ABOUT YOU:  Oh, you thought it was about you!  Your goal each day should be to wake up in complete gratitude for the person who has committed to love you.  You have to look beyond your baggage, past beliefs, past hurts and pains and make it about him/her.  You do this and watch what is reciprocated in return.

7.  COMMUNICATE WITH LOVE:  This means "think before you speak" - work to not respond on the defense, listen to what your lover is really saying, ask questions, don't guess and ALWAYS think of how he/she is feeling.

6. SHOW AFFECTION:  Everyone needs to be touched at some point.  A tender touch, warm embrace of "hello" and "good-bye" tingles right to the heart.  Take the time to also do unexpected moments of affection.  Nothing says LOVE like butterflies from that unexpected touch.  And, NEVER ...even in an argument keep affection from a person.  This is hurtful behavior.
5. BE ALLOWING:  Give the other the freedom to live, breathe, have their own passions.   Yes, without your control, without your judgement, without your retributions.  Allow them to grow, make mistakes, learn, evolve, be their own person (not a mirror image of you).  Don't smolder their light....enhance their shine!
4. BE AFFIRMING: Value, Appreciate and Honor your Love. Let them know you hold them in high esteem. They are appreciated ...valued!
3. OFFER EMOTIONAL SAFETY: Give unconditional loving acceptance, Make sure you love the person for exactly who they are - and that is ENOUGH!
2. BE OPEN: Be approachable, Be emotionally available, Discuss what is happening in your life, Honest, timely appropriate openness and disclosure builds trust and intimacy. Sets up for wonderful communication skills!
1. PAY ATTENTION: Be Present, Be Engaged, Make Eye Contact, Listen & Remember what the other person says, likes, wants and NEEDS. (don't be thinking what you are going to say back while he/she is talking)

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